we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Randomize
