At least make sure they are 18
Why
my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize
