So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
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