woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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