Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
