Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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