I'm drive I can fine osifer
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
