I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
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