i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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