just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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