Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Randomize
