It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
On Saturday, I sharted on my roommates dog while trying to make it smell my farts. Today I got security clearance to work for one of the most respected and secretive govt agencies in the US
It's the American dream
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize