Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
This is not my ceiling
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Randomize
