i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
