real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Randomize