DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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