well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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