But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
My balls are so social today.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Randomize
