she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
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