Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
My vagina is officially offended.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
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