I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Randomize