You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
