just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
Who died my cat blue again?
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
