I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
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