Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
