mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Randomize
