Yo dont text me then not text me
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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