I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Randomize
