That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
Randomize
