She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
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