is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
Randomize
