He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
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