if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
