this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
her facebook's as public as her vagina
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
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