What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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