I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
