So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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