So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
