So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize
