how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
