SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize