Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
