trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
