she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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