I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
