i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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