Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
