When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Randomize