I got chris browned last night
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
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