i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
